Written by Bear @ 12:57 pm

I try to think about Buck Angel on rotten days especially. Ever since he came last August to The Smitten Kitten, the very thought of him makes the day seem less long, the coffee a little fresher, and the mounting paperwork seem like nothing. Buck is a light in the world whether he is caring for his team of dogs at his home in Mexico, donating money to Haiti, or producing some f*cking hot porn. Having struggled in his early life, transitioned to male, and become a icon in the porn industry, Buck offers a unique, and often challenging, perspective within the sex industry. He makes porn that he likes to make, with people he likes to work with, and at the end of the day, he controls the show. He even has time to start a Body Building Website. Damn that man never tires.
So I have been following the mounting discourse around his presentation at Yale University. Yale hosts a biennial Sex Week, where they offer an amazing spread of events ranging from sex and religion to appearances by porn stars like Buck. Oh and there is free STI testing. For some Alums and students this is an exciting event, supporting the discussion on the sex industry, sex, and sexuality, others are upset by a guest such as Buck Angel, porn being not an academic topic in their minds, and a few are upset that there exists a sex week at all. One forum member comments, “Bringing in a porn star to speak at sex week is like bring mark mcgwire to speak at a diet and exercise conference - that is unless the more legitimate reasons for sw are really just a cover for perpetuating the systems of dominance and image manufacturing purveyed by the commercial sex industry”. Buck Angel is a business man no doubt, he understands what sells and what doesn’t, he gets the internet versus DVD thing. But, he also continues to be a radical presence in the sex industry, creating sex positive, inclusive porn, when so many are not. This presence, like so many others mentioned on this blog (Tristan Taormino, Madison Young, Pink and White Productions) are rallying against system of dominance in its own language, resemantizing Porn, creating more and better.
Plus it is really really really hot stuff.
I wish I went to Yale or had the budget of Yale to put on such an event. Hanging out with Tristan, Buck, and Madison for week doesn’t sound to shabby. I am glad to have met these people who are doing such great work and who happen to be smart and kind individuals. I know their presentations will be radical, well thought out, and a bit funny too. Have fun at Yale!

Written by Alley @ 5:57 pm

I’m sick of studies attempting to prove the G-spot doesn’t exist. After all this time and effort getting medical science to recognize the G-spot’s existence why are we turning right back around and attempting to dis-prove its existence?  This is back in the news again because scientists from King’s College in London came out with a new study suggesting that the G-spot is suggestive.

Times online reports that the scientists conducted the study as follows: “In the research, 1,804 British women aged 23-83 answered questionnaires. All were pairs of identical or non-identical twins. Identical twins share all their genes, while non-identical pairs share 50% of theirs. If one identical twin reported having a G-spot, this would make it far more likely that her sister would give the same answer. But no such pattern emerged, suggesting the G-spot is a matter of the woman’s subjective opinion.

While 56% of women overall claimed to have a G-spot, they tended to be younger and more sexually active. Identical twins were no more likely to share the characteristic than non-identical twins.”

Ok, so more than half of women felt that they did have a G-spot, and the ones that felt that way were more sexually active.  This seems to me to point towards the G-spot existing.  The vagina has muscle tone like any other part of a person’s body.  My belief is that people who work their vagina in a way that uses the G-spot know that it exists, and the rest are not in touch with that part of their body. People who don’t work their triceps don’t tend to think much about their existence, but that doesn’t mean that people who use their triceps and know they are there are wrong about having them. The study uses identical twins, but it doesn’t control for the type of sex they are having, and I doubt that they are having identical amounts of sex, or even the same types of sex.

Beverly Whipple, a researcher who believes strongly in the existence of the G-spot called their research “flawed”, and we couldn’t agree more.  Not everyone feels their G-spot, not everyone has G-spot based orgasms, but many people do, and dismissing their experience as imaginary is insulting and infuriating. For all of you out there who enjoy your G-spot, please keep at it!

Written by Alley @ 11:03 am

In this youtube video Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross talk about how to tell whether or not you had an orgasm.  You can watch more videos of them on Ross’s youtube site. I think it’s important to embrace all orgasms, big and small!

Written by Bear @ 12:21 pm

Here is a really interesting article put out by Planned Parenthood on the history of social conditioning surrounding masturbation. As our readers know, I am of the belief that masturbation can build a healthier, more peaceful planet. Some of the attitudes towards sex in this article make me sick to my stomach, ranging from abusive to bizarre. “[Parents] could take their children to a wax museum where the effects of post-masturbation disease were displayed with life-size, grotesquely deformed statuettes, or they could show their children engravings of a woman who lost her nose by masturbating (Stengers & Van Neck, 2001, 7)” I think this is a good reminder that masturbation continues to be something to fight for. Consider your masturbation practice radical in that sense. It is not just good for you, it is good for cultural consciousness.

Written by Frances Meowington @ 12:23 pm

with so many options to choose from, picking your very first vibrator can seem overwhelming at first, but it need not be a frustrating ordeal. there is no right or wrong vibrator (unless its made from toxic materials, see c.a.t.t. for more information on those), in fact i’ve rarely met one that i didn’t love using. however most vibrators tend to be suited for a particular position or style of stimulation, and some vibrators are much more convenient for partner sex, while others are designed primarily for solo use. because different vibrators have different talents, i am a big advocate of having a well-rounded collection. but for a first vibrator i am a big fan of those that are versatile in letting the user experiment with many kinds of stimulation. so i’ll go through some of the things you need to consider when picking out your first vibrator:

do i want a vibrator for external use only or one that can be used both internally and externally?

vibrators generally fall into one of two umbrella categories: those that are used only for external stimulation of the clitoris, vulva, and anywhere else external that feels good, and those that can be used for both external stimulation and the internal stimulation of the g-spot and the vagina.

external only vibrators can be many different shapes and sizes because they don’t need to fit inside of you. they can range from the very small, such as the yoni or the nea, to the very large, like the cone or the magic wand. smaller sized external vibrators are fantastic for partner play because they won’t come between you and your sexy someone. some of these smaller vibes are ergonomically shaped to fit against your body, like the layaspot or the lily, allowing you to focus more on your partner(s) and less on the positioning of your vibe. this is particularly nice for rear-entry positions where there is not always a lot of room for vibrators in the first place. the advantage to bigger vibes is having a larger vibrating surface area to stimulate your self against, allowing you to move the vibrator less if you want.

vibrators made for both internal and external use tend to be within a certain size range, suitable for vaginal insertion, and are either straight like a wand like the bgood, luv touch slim, or velvet desire, or have a curve or ridge that is designed to make the g-spot more accessible like the venus, meany, or gigi. the benefit of getting this style of vibrator that it allows you to experiment with clitoral and g-spot stimulation with one toy. just remember it won’t allow you to do both at once, for that you will need a dual stimulation vibrator.

dual stimulation vibrators, such as mary mermaid or the rock chick, provide the user with clitoral and g-spot stimulation at the same time. these toys are immensely popular because they are seen as an all-in-one toy that can do everything. while dual stimulation vibrators can be great, i don’t usually recommend them for a first time buyer for a couple of reasons, centering around the fact that they are not as versatile as other types of vibrators. for one thing, while dual stimulation vibrators is really effective at providing one type of stimulation, they only provide that one type of stimulation, not allowing the user to experiment with many different types of stimulation. secondly, because of the way dual stimulation vibrators are shaped, they don’t work well for partner play because they are usually too cumbersome to use with another person.

do i want a 1-speed vibrator or a multi-speed vibrator?

while many women love vibration, not everyone wants the back-massager power of the magic wand. some women enjoy really light vibration, or prefer to vary the speed of vibration throughout their use. if you’ve never had a vibrator it can be hard to know what your perfect speed is, so for a first time vibrator i always recommend getting one that is multi-speed so you can adjust until you find the right setting for you.

do i want an electric vibrator, battery operated, or rechargeable?

not for the faint of heart, electric vibrators are as strong as they come. so if you’re feeling the need for speed, a well-built electric vibrator is a great toy to have. a lot of electric vibrators either come with attachments (like the wahl coil or eroscillator) or have attachments that you can buy for them (like the gee whiz made for the magic wand and acuvibe) giving you many different options for added stimulation. the only downsides to these vibes are that they are generally rather large, loud, and have long cords.

battery operated vibrators are often more economical, smaller, and you don’t have to worry about being near an outlet to get them going. and while not quite as powerful as electric vibrators, many battery operated vibes like the pocket rocket and clit exciter still have super strength. the downside to battery operated vibrators is that they tend not to last as long as electric or rechargeable vibrators, they can be loud, and you have to remember to keep extra batteries on hand, or be prepared to raid your remote or other household devices.

rechargeable vibrators are a godsend for those of us who hate dealing with either batteries or cords. while they are a little more expensive than other vibrators, rechargeable vibrators like those from lelo are very well made and will last much longer than most battery operated vibrators. so in addition to saving money on batteries, it will be longer before you need to buy a replacement. they also tend to be quieter, so if you have roommates you don’t want to disturb, a rechargeable might be the right vibe for you.

do i want a vibrator with pulse patterns?

some vibrators come with pulse pattern settings programmed into them, such as the ivy, the elise, and little dolly. for some people pulse patterns are another way to vary their vibration and explore new types of stimulation.

do i want my vibrator to be made with silicone coating or hard plastic?

while many vibrators are made of hard plastic, there are also vibes that are coated in silicone (the thickness of which depends on the toy) giving it a softer feel. some people prefer this softness, while others prefer the frictionless smooth touch of a plastic vibrator. both are great options, just be aware that silicone has more surface drag than skin, so you will probably want to use a water-based lube with your toy if you choose silicone. if you are a fan of silicone-based lubes (which are not compatible with silicone toys) you might want to pick a plastic vibrator.

do i care what my vibrator looks like?

some people care a tremendous amount about what their toy looks like while other people couldn’t care less. on the one hand, you generally don’t spend a lot of time looking at your vibe. on the other hand, how could having a sexy looking vibe be a bad thing? only you can decide what importance aesthetics have in picking your vibrator.

suggestions for a great first vibrator at every price:

external only:

$ clit exciter - i’ve sold more of these to first timers (and veterans) than i can count. the clit exciter is a great external waterproof vibrator that is super adjustable and goes from soft buzz to very strong at its max speed. it’s slender design with slanted head designed to encase the clitoris is perfect for partner play, and a bargain at 24.99.

$$ layaspot - the layaspot was designed to rest against the body making it easy and comfortable to use. it has adjustable speed and 3 pulse patterns programmed into it, giving you many different options for stimulation. i don’t sell people vibrators based on what’s a “bestseller,” but the layaspot is a bestseller deserving of its popularity.

$$$ nea - like the layaspot the nea was designed to cup the body, and at almost half the size of the layaspot it is ideal for use during any position. It is adjustable speed, has 5 pulse patterns programmed into it, and holds a charge for 7 hours (after only 2 hours of charge time). It comes with a small satin bag to stow it in, a 1-year manufacturer warranty, and a small charger that looks like a cell phone charger. discreet, beautiful, and finely crafted, this little vibrator can go anywhere and do everything with you.

internal and external use:

$ dream massager “the g” - curvaceous and perfectly seamless, “the g” is a luxury item at an incredible price. a waterproof vibrator with decadent multispeed capabilities, “the g” has a pointed tip designed for the elusive g-spot and curves that seem to gyrate inside you, this is a vibrator to fall head over heels for.

$$ little dolly or meany - either of these fun factory mini vibes make for a great all-purpose vibrator, both are long enough to reach the g-spot and compact enough to use for external stimulation during partner play. they are both multi-speed and have 3 pulse patterns programmed into them and their silicone coating is perfect for those looking for a softer feel. little dolly’s nose curves to meet the g-spot, but if getting off with a small dolphin isn’t for you, meany’s gentle ridges also work great for g-spot stimulation.

$$$ gigi - shapely and seductive, gigi’s firm silicone shaft offers the finest in ergonomic vaginal penetration.  rechargeable with adjustable speed, 5 pulse patterns, and a 1-year warranty, gigi is one of the most versatile and popular vibrators around.  if you’re looking for a vibrator that delivers, look to your new friend gigi.